High School Kids, my old country house


Well Hello and Happy Thursday – otherwise known around here as  –


OH – MY – GOD!!!!!

All kidding aside, Prom is a big deal – at least around here. My firstborn was not super in to it…but went nonetheless and had one great Prom and one kind of sucky one. My daughter was of course ALL into prom – her senior year she got her dress in October – she found an Ebay store where the dresses were gorgeous and cheap – but came all the way from China so wanted to make sure she got it in time – which – she did. And now – the baby – will attending his first prom Saturday!!

Phoebe PROM 2016

When I was 17 – I had just moved to a new school – and still had to fight back tears on most days – I missed my old friends so much. But I got new friends – the ones I am having the Girls Weekend with – and they gave me a safe place to land. I remember being in P.E. and one friend came running over in her gym clothes to a group of us sitting on the bleachers , and panted ….”Curt wants to know if you will go to Pantherilla (our Prom)  with him?” – (in the OLD days a Prom-Posal usually came second-hand). I said yes! My Mom was so happy that she splurged on a fancy dress. I raced home – 5 days after prom to see the gratuitous PROM Before PICTURES (imagine if our kids had to wait!) –  that my Mom had taken and was going to pick up while I was at school. I remember jumping out of my carpool car and racing in the house to meet my Mom who had a terrible look on her face – she said

“Oh Lesli!!! I Must have had the lens covered….I….”

“MOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ” and i think I might have said  – “I hate you!” – which to this day – I feel sad about. So, no pictures.

Anyway – Our Prom here is Saturday. Having raised 2 boys and one girl –  I have experienced both versions – and this year I have been asked back to take pictures  – AT THE PROM – I just love seeing the kids all dressed up and awkward – and absolutely beautiful. That will be a hoot!


SO, THIS being my 3rd time around – I thought I would share my a few things I have learned –


  1. Make sure ALL devices are charged. The battery went dead on my camera at “Pictures” for Phoebe’s first prom. That was not fun. To help with sharing photos – I recently got an AWESOME NEW DEVICE on AMAZON that has changed my life!!! This adapter makes sharing photos easier. Just just pop the card from the camera into the iphone and download the photos you want!!!
  2. MAKE YOUR KID EAT something mid day. If they are around, grab maybe their favorite sandwich or Power bars – whatever they can munch in two bites. They try SO HARD to NOT need us – but they do need to eat. Stash something in their bag if they are gathering before at a friend’s house to get ready – or host a gathering and get some pot-luck snacks going!
  3. Get an itinerary. It helps to have a rough idea of where they will be – getting ready with friends – going to dinner before -. where they plan to go after. Often they go to prom for the first hour or so and then head off to parties and to friend’s houses. I like to KNOW where they will be….even if it might change mid way – it gives them and you some frame of reference.
  4. Set a CURFEW – and if you have a regular curfew – Maybe consider extending it with provisions like regular check-ins and calls. We hosted gatherings here  before and after many proms and let the kids hang out until 2-3am. This gave us an option to supervise but also gave the kids the ability to hang out.
  5. Offer to reserve a a LYFT or UBER. Most kids won’t ask you to drive – but you can offer to set them up with rides. For many reasons – safety obviously is one – but there are also lots of scams where kids will get their cars towed and have to cough up money to get their car back – true story – One of Phoebe’s proms they decided to go for Pizza afterwards and parked in a spot they thought was okay. It said (no parking Saturday only and it was 11:30pm on Saturday) When they returned the boys car had been towed. If they do drive – make sure they have $$ for parking and remind them to look for ANY signs that say “No Parking after….etc” .
  6. You can BUY a Used TUX on Ebay (The FORMAL SHOP) for less than renting a Used tux! This year we got Cooper’s Tux on ebay. It got here in 3 days. We bought a new shirt and the shoes were $6! THERE ARE MANY OPTIONS – you can buy new ones too !!! EBAY

    We bought a TUX, pants , shirt and shoes on ebay for less than the rental here!
  7. One of our favorite PROM DRESS websites is LULUS. (there are MANY great sites these days!!!) This place is awesome!!! I mean girls (and women!) can get EVERYTHING except maybe the corsage. Their prices are great too – selection incredible and shipping prompt. Phoebe just got a dress there for a College formal event – Lulu’s has casual to super fancy formal and shoes and accessories! Your daughters probably already know about it but I did not and love it for myself when things come up!!!!
    LULUS – dance-the-night-away-dusty-purple-backless-maxi-dress

    8. Corsages – There are many great options on ETSY. I have decided that NEXT YEAR  I might just go buy a few dozen Roses or Gardenia and make corsages for prom kids! They are so expensive!!!! I told my son that I will make them and take orders and hand them out on the day before prom…it can be a fund-raiser!!! We ended up shelling out $40 this year on a corsage – $40 which I actually offered to GIVE the kids towards their dinner tab – but you know – they don’t want to be the ONLY ONE THAT DOESN’T HAVE ONE!!!!! You know – end of the world stuff but it is what matters to them and at the very least we could make it more affordable!



    9. TRUST- this is such a BIG one. There is NO GUARANTEE of anything and I would never tell anyone how to parent. But in one year our son will go to college and he needs to know we believe in his good decision-making ability.  Any decision we make about Prom night – we  decided with THIS kid and THESE friends. Every child is different. Listen to your child – they say so much with so few words. and Ask questions!!! Will there be alcohol? Will there be adults present? What are THOSE house rules? Review YOUR rules – whatever they are….and then…trust.

  1. REMEMBER this is THEIR BIG night. It can be very hard for them to share the experience, or even be very communicative at all –  DURING all the prep and the rush to get ready. Their lives are so crazy busy – I have found if I JUST be available, make sure things are pressed – get supplies like snacks and deodorant and fresh socks (still need to get those!) maybe hair spray and any stuff they might need and then – insist on at least ONE photo and then let them go and have the time of their lives… and then AFTER prom is usually when our kids would/could talk about it – but before – they can be nervous and worried and navigating drama.

Well  – there you go. ready set – LET’S GO TO PROM!!!!!

there is ALWAYS GREAT INSIGHT and up-to-date information on GROWN AND FLOWN and I would LOVE to hear your insights, pointers, ideas, remedies, etc or any PROM related tidbits!!! Do share!!!!

4 thoughts on “PROM PREP FOR PARENTS!

  1. I have three boys and a girl. What a difference when it comes to the prom! My daughter is going with a boy who she doesn’t even know but she is so excited – let’s hope this kid doesn’t stand her up last minute (happened last year.) Thanks for the tips – my boys got dressed 10 minutes before they needed to leave and allowed very few pictures. My daughters prom prep starts 4 hours early with hair and makeup. I’m hoping she allows more pics. It sure is different from when I went with my perm and Gunney Sax dress….:)

    1. They are so different aren’t they???? – I have found the same differences to be true in college – my daughter keeps in touch, tells me all the ins and out and my son – crickets unless in is having a rough time. So I have come to associate “quiet” from him and “GOOD”! Hope your daughter has a blast!

  2. In Canada, at least where I live, we don’t really have a “prom” but we have Grade 12 Graduation. So the lower grades aren’t even allowed to participate in it. Some schools have it in May, others in June. Our school goes right to the end of June, so our graduation is on June 29. The kids have their cap and gown ceremony in the morning and then go get all dressed up for the Graduation party that evening. It is a pretty big deal and the girls, especially start shopping during the previous fall for their dresses. A couple of years ago when she was in Grade 10, my daughter said she wouldn’t even go to her graduation when it happened. Then in Grade 11, she said she would probably go but she wasn’t going to wear a “stupid” dress. Imagine my happiness when she announced in October that she was going shopping for dresses. She ended up choosing a navy blue princess style dress that is the most “girly” thing I have ever seen her in! However, she is still wearing her Birkenstocks with the dress — a girl has to be comfortable! You won’t be able to see them anyway, under that huge skirt! The cap and gown ceremony is very long. There are about 500 graduates. So you aren’t even guaranteed to see everyone you want to. Then, once the students are all dressed up in their formal wear, we go for the evening event with a grand march (this is when you get to see all the beautiful dresses), visiting and dancing. It goes by fast. Then the kids go off to the various “after parties”, which are highly controlled in terms of safety, etc. For my son, when he graduates, the ceremony will be on his 18th birthday. Where we live 18 is where you become “legal” — drinking age, voting, it’s when you officially become an adult. So he will have two big things to celebrate.

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