old country house blog

THE THINGS WE REMEMBER…….THE THINGS THEY FORGET

We moved to My Old Country House in April of 2004
…almost 8 years ago.
My children were 3, 5 and 7.
It was a sweet time. All the times are sweet, but this was a particularly sweet time.
I had one child in First grade… a big boy. My sweet baby girl was in Kindergarten
…and the baby boy, the perpetual baby…was just 3.
My little buddy. Cooper.
Cooper helping clean
Cooper helping clean
Recently, I was driving my buddy, now 12, to his indoor soccer game which, if you have not had the pleasure… is one part soccer, one part Jai-lai and one part Dodge ball (for the fans).
..and I took a short cut through our old neighborhood.
Taking for granted that he knew it was our old neighborhood, I did not mention it until we were driving past our old house.
“There’s our house!” I said.
and he said ” Thats where we lived?
“Don’t you remember it?” I asked.
Without hesitation, he said
“No.”

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I was dumbfounded.
We have driven past the old house so many times.
And all along I thought he knew it was his house!
In fact, I am almost certain that he DID know it even a few years ago.
This is the only other house he has lived in…the house he came home to when he was born.
The house where he learned to walk and talk and be a person.
Yes, I know, he was a baby. but I have been here, right by his side, remembering all of it,
days like they were yesterday…
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heck, I still worry about things that have long since past and people who have long since gone
 and he is so completely totally living his little life in the moment, right next to me,
that he has absolutely no connection to the past…
That part I have been powerless  to freeze or
even slow down.
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I feel like I live in the moment, but am I really doing that?
Sometimes, I am looking in a drawer, and I run into a tiny sock,
no bigger than my thumb and I have to
remind myself, it fits no one…just the baby that used to live here.
I remember when my kids were tiny, being terrified to go away from them. I would worry…
that if something happened to me, that they would NOT remember me
and now my worst fears are confirmed…they don’t.
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Once, when I had just One tiny baby, I was at the mall with a friend.
We were sitting in the courtyard, in our 
perfect baby, all the biggest messes stayed in the diapers…
we still had huge crushes on our husbands..BLISS...
.and we could not imagine being happier…
…into our peripheral vision…burst a Cannonball of a Mom, dragging a screaming child,
he was  10 years old, maybe 6…realistically probably 4 …I had no frame of reference…
they all looked so big…TOO big to me, and the Mom looked at us,
she paused, and smiled and said
“Enjoy it now girls, before they can talk!!!”
It was such an assault on our bliss… and I remember thinking
“DON’T make it go too fast!I don’t want this to end.”
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I wish I could just enjoy it more without constantly reminding myself..or being reminded that
the meter is running and that the ride is over halfway done.
Why do I do that?
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It’s not like I look at my dog everyday and think;
“Oh woe is me, at best you have another 8 good years…”
That would be pathetic. So why can’t I just be happy for who we are.
Especially when I know  full well that in a few short years
THIS exact place where I stand, will be
what I am nostalgic about…
THIS will seem little.
And Perfect.
When I pack them in the car to go to college…
THIS is what I will miss.
And I wonder…will they remember it?

this?…

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5 thoughts on “THE THINGS WE REMEMBER…….THE THINGS THEY FORGET

  1. Lesli-
    Such a nice blog post & really hits home to me right now with a 3yr old & a 1.5yr old. I follow only a handful of blogs (yours being one my top favs!) and while I love reading the blogs & feeling inspired by what I see…..at the end of the day, bottom line is I still live in a house with 2 toddlers. I chuckled out loud at your 2nd to last photo – that is exactly what my living room looks like right now!!! I go through fits where I want to purge all the plastic toys & get back to the beautifully staged living room we had prior to becoming parents & then I soon realize that I’m sure gonna miss these days. When there aren’t any lego’s to pick up, or matchbox cars to trip over late at night.

    Thank you for sharing your stories! Heartwarming.
    Tia

  2. I am sure I don’t need to tell you…that you will get back there soon enough…your house will be too quiet and you, like me, will haul out the old photos…with the kids, and smile at those days. One thing I wish i had done more of, it was not as easy…is take more videos….I miss their little voices!!! We are blessed. Thanks for stopping by…hugs to the labs…

  3. YOU are a masterful writer, Lesli! You capture in a few words and pictures what would take me a book to convey! They may not remember in the moment, but my kids remember things from their childhoods that I have totally forgotten! You will be surprised when they get older how much influence you and Damon have had.

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